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Sir Bernard's Stately Homes was a series of British TV comedy series first shown in 1998 on BBC Two, it was later re-run on Play UK. Only six 10 minute programmes were produced, they were written by and stared Matt Lucas and David Walliams. It beared many similarities to the more well known Rock Profile. The series was directed by Edgar Wright, one of the creative minds behind Asylum, Spaced, Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz, and produced by Myfanwy Moore who would become the producer of Little Britain. The central character was Bernard Chumley, played by Matt Lucas, who would go on to be a regular character in Little Britain.
|S01E01||Baxter Grange||00/00/0000||Baxter Grange is the ancestral home of the Nelsons, since Admiral Horatio Nelson took up residence in 1804. Bernard takes us on a feeble tour of Baxter Grange in this episode.|
|S01E02||Browning Abbey||00/00/0000||Sir Bernard Chumley (off the Telly) visits Browning Abbey, Buckinghamshire, home to the archbishop of Mexford. Bernard's sidekick Antony (Tony) Rodgers (42), out on probation after murdering his wife, is on the run with Chumley after the incident of Nelson's uniform in Episode 1. They band together to find the golden potato Newspapers report Sir Bernard and Tony's disappearance, mentioning an incident where Sir Bernard ""accidentally"" cut the hair of the first Juliet Bravo, causing Bernard to protest his innocence throughout the episode. Browning Abbey was home to monks in the 15th Century, who were famed for making their own wine, preserves and chambourcy Hippopotamous. The Abbey boasts a famous collection of dolls, greatly loved by the verger Jeffrey (David Foxxe) While Bernard records his documentary, keeping the verger busy, Tony ransacks the Abbey, looking for the golden potato.|
|S01E03||Yates Castle||00/00/0000||Chumley and Rodgers venture to Yates Castle in Suffolk. The castle is the former home of the Chumley family, but was lost in a card game by Sir Bernard's great-great grandfather. It is now owned by Dame Lily Yates (David Foxxe). Tony tries to discover the whereabouts of the Golden Potato from Lily, while Sir Bernard seeks revenge by attempting to burn it down the house by setting fire to Lily's bedroom.|
|S01E04||Bronson House||00/00/0000||Sir Bernard Chumley (off the Telly) and sidekick Tony Rodgers, visit Bronson House, the country retreat of Princess Anne. They are met by Penelope Lowe (Julie T Wallace), the housekeeper who's mother is ill and leaves them on strict instructions not to enter the Princess Royal's private chambers. When left alone in the house, Chumley and Tony of course ransack the bedroom and try on the Princess's clothes. However, they soon run into their rivals and mirror images from a similar show, Sir Herbert Lumley (David Foxxe) and his sidekick, (Rodger) Paul Putner.|
|S01E05||Kendall Park||00/00/0000||Sir Bernard Chumley and Tony visit Kendall Park which is attached to the country's largest theme park (helpfully played by Chessington world of adventure). Without enough money to pay for entrance they steal two cub scouts uniforms and sneak in. Rhys Thomas makes a cameo as the theme park teller. Paul Putner plays the Scout Master and David Foxxe as the owner of the house. Roland Rivron plays a man who needs to tie a knot. After disposing of David Foxxe, Sir Bernard and Tony get to ""go on the rides"" in the style of the famous cub scouts who ate their packed lunch on Jim'll fix it!|
|S01E06||Stebson Towers||00/00/0000||Sir Bernard Chumley and Tony visit Stebson Towers, the country retreat of Sir Elton John. This is the last stop for Chumley and Tony in their quest to find the golden potato and evade arrest. Finding the golden potato, Chumley and Tony disguise themselves as Elton and George Michael and end up on Later with Jools Holland singing ""I could be so good for you"", the Dennis Waterman-penned theme from Minder (cf Little Britain...). Guest stars include the ever-faithful David Foxxe as Elton, Paul Putner as George Michael (both these characters were being played by Matt and David in Rock Profiles at the time of broadcast). Rhys Thomas from Episode 5 returns as a policeman, as does "" Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart"" Nicholas Courtney (David is a huge Doctor Who fan, of course). Jools Holland plays himself.|